Compiled by Alexa Ash
Press Play Reporter
On this week’s issue of “How Can Hollyw(eir)d Get Any Worse?” we see an emergence of celebrity violence between Florida Rapper XXXTentacion and the rapping boyband trio, Migos, consisting of members Quavo, Offset, and Takeoff.
After publicly accusing these One Direction wannabes of jumping him and, during the violent throes of rap god passion, pulling a gun against him, XXXTentacion took to the only true form of news any of us can rely on these days: he posted an Instagram video. His Instagram video contains the earth-shattering footage of two men, said to be members of Migos, walking up the stairs, and then, wait for it, nothing.
The only evidence of the conflict we have is the yelling in the background of this video and the incomprehensible snapchat videos rapper XXXTentacion posted just after the fight.
Could this be a stir in the pot of a larger, more serious revival of Death Row Records vs. Bad Boy Records, round two? Whatever the case may be, I think it’s about time Tupac and Biggie came out of hiding and regulated the situation, am I right?
This just in: People Magazine has named their Sexiest Man Alive and it’s… Blake Shelton? This country crooner & resident judge on NBC’s “The Voice,” seems just as shocked by this revelation as we are. After first releasing the cover of this most anticipated issue on his twitter account, as humble and thankful as he could be, he writes “Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.” Well, he appears to be having a good laugh about this as he uses the hashtag #donthatemebecauseimbeautiful on almost every tweet since his coronation. Trust me Blake, I think we're all laughing. Former Sexiest Man Alive winner, Hugh Jackman, took to twitter to give the new SMA a little advice: “Milk the sexy status for ALL it’s worth. The reign goes all too quickly.” Being that Blake Shelton, on both twitter and instagram, refers to everything he does now as “sex,y” it's safe to say that he will never let anyone live this down. So let's all raise a glass in honor of this momentous time in history and prepare ourselves for next years Sexiest Man Alive probable victor, Steve Buscemi.